64 Quotes About Grief, Coping and Life After Loss

A good quote serves many purposes.  A quote helps us put our own thoughts and feelings into perspective, it allows us to use the words of others to communicate or to convey a message, and it helps us to feel a sense of commonality when we find our feelings, experiences, and observations match those of another.

Although we love a good grief quote, Litsa and I were slow to join in on the quote-pic phenomenon.  The Internet just seemed plastered with inspirational platitudes pasted on pictures of sunsets and rainbows. It all seemed so trite and reductive we decided not to add to the noise.  Then we got over ourselves.  

Here are 64 (Shhh! There are really 63) quotes about grief, coping and life after loss.  In going through these I realized it’s hard to tell how a handful of these would be considered grief-related; I guess you’ll just have to take our word for it.  Feel free to steal and share any of these images.


thomas campbell

maya angelou


blue sky





kubler ross



bradburywe remember






























have yourself a merry little christmas
FI - impremanence
disenfranchised grief 5


master a grief


















February 25, 2019

112 responses on "64 Quotes About Grief, Coping and Life After Loss"

  1. Today is the first anniversary of my ex-husband’s death. As a friend pointed out, this is the second “first anniversary” of his death, something I had not realized, because like my friend’s father’s death, it happened on a Holiday that changes dates from year to year. So although my husband passed on Easter weekend last year, and that was in March, this year Easter isn’t until April, this weekend in fact. My body went into depression in March; limbs heavy as cement, dragging through days. The lifting of oppressive weather started to help some, the lighter days, the warmer weather, but now the observance is here. No way around it. Good Friday is here. Today.
    Last Good Friday I was at the church where I play piano. I had found a beautiful song I’d never heard before about Jesus dying. The repeating words throughout the song were, “And He never said a mumbling word.” I sang this as a prelude to the service, at the piano, welled up with emotion.
    Before, during, and after the song, I had a powerful premonition to go directly to my ex-husband.
    Of course I told myself, “I can’t. I’m doing the music for a Good Friday service, and my car is in the shop. I’m at the mercy of others for a ride. No one would understand this. I don’t understand it myself.” I continued on with the service, knowing that even after the service would end, I would not be able to go see him because of not having my car.
    The next day he was found dead by his best friend, who was also his landlord. They said he could have been there as long as 24 hours. It was a horrible, unexpected death from the flu complicated because he also had diabetes. Furniture was knocked over in the living room; a small bookcase. A tall lamp was knocked over and broken. His glasses were under the couch. They had to call his phone to find it. Somehow he had made it to his bedroom. There was vomit everywhere.
    He was on his back. It seems he went unconscious and aspirated on his vomit. This is beyond horrific that he should die such a horrific death, ALONE.
    His friend started screaming when he found him. He had a friend go in with him because he had a bad feeling when the phone AND knocking on the door brought no results.
    Tonight I have to go and play piano for that SAME Good Friday service. I am screaming out, “NO!” inside. But there is no one else to take my place. I have my own car for tonight, and my daughter is willing to go with me, to make tonight DIFFERENT. But the different I WANT can’t happen. The different I WANT is to drive to him after the service. To be there in time to help him with his illness,
    to call for medical help, to get him on his side so he wouldn’t drown on his vomit, but most of all to
    tell him I still love him, and always will.

  2. Today is the first anniversary of my ex-husband’s death. As a friend pointed out, this is the second “first anniversary” of his death, something I had not realized, because like my friend’s father’s death, it happened on a Holiday that changes dates from year to year. So although my husband passed on Easter weekend last year, and that was in March, this year Easter isn’t until April, this weekend in fact. My body went into depression in March; limbs heavy as cement, dragging through days. The lifting of oppressive weather started to help some, the lighter days, the warmer weather, but now the observance is here. No way around it. Good Friday is here. Today.
    Last Good Friday I was at the church where I play piano. I had found a beautiful song I’d never heard before about Jesus dying. The repeating words throughout the song were, “And He never said a mumbling word.” I sang this as a prelude to the service, at the piano, welled up with emotion.
    Before, during, and after the song, I had a powerful premonition to go directly to my ex-husband.
    Of course I told myself, “I can’t. I’m doing the music for a Good Friday service, and my car is in the shop. I’m at the mercy of others for a ride. No one would understand this. I don’t understand it myself.” I continued on with the service, knowing that even after the service would end, I would not be able to go see him because of not having my car.
    The next day he was found dead by his best friend, who was also his landlord. It was a horrible, unexpected death from the flu complicated because he also had diabetes. Furniture was knocked over in the living room; a small bookcase. A tall lamp was knocked over and broken. His glasses were under the couch. They had to call his phone to find it. Somehow he had made it to his bedroom. There was vomit everywhere.
    He was on his back. It seems he went unconscious and aspirated on his vomit. This is beyond horrific that he should die such a horrific death, ALONE.
    His friend started screaming when he found him. He had a friend go in with him because he had a bad feeling when the phone AND knocking on the door brought no results.
    Tonight I have to go and play piano for that SAME Good Friday service. I am screaming out, “NO!” inside. But there is no one else to take my place. I have my own car for tonight, and my daughter is willing to go with me, to make tonight DIFFERENT. But the different I WANT can’t happen. The different I WANT is to drive to him after the service. To be there in time to help him with his illness,
    to call for medical help, to get him on his side so he wouldn’t drown on his vomit, but most of all to
    tell him I still love him, and always will.

  3. Four years ago today I lost my oldest child. My son, 31 years old. I am blessed to have 3 other children who I love deeply. They have supported me in my grief until this past year. They are tired of my sadness, they are tired of me weeping, they want their mom back. Two of them have bonded closer than ever and I love the way they love each other but I’m hurt at the wall that’s been put up and pushed me out. They’ve said I’m negative and I talk to much about my son and how things “would be” if he were here.
    I’m lost and I’m broken and I do talk about him and I do think things would be different if he were here. Is that wrong? I am single and don’t have anyone to share my feelings with in an emotional and intimate way. I need my children. How do I get them back? How am I going to be the same when I am no longer whole? Please help me.

    • Hey, its perfectly normal what you are going through and the reaction you are receiving is normal too. I am a son who today marks 5th anniversary my mother, she slept and never woke up , it took me 3 years to feel normal again, I was not able to let go of her and the pain resulted in a heart attack in the first 3 months, meds were not helping as I was grieving. Finally I remembered her words to me that I have to take care of the family and the only way I could do this was by healing. The one and only thing that helped me was to stop thinking about living without her. My entire life revolved around her and even today when I think of her and what am i doing here without her in my life my heart aches literally as though I will have another attack, i had to fulfill her wish and continue to live for the rest of the family. In next 14 months I lost my father.

      I shared this with you as I can feel your pain as a mother, and I would request you to just try focusing on the loved ones around and with you, they need you. The more you detach yourself, the more you will be lonely, no one will understand the depth of your pain. Everyone has their own way and time to heal, some take days, some weeks, some months and people like me years. We all have to live with our own problems, life keeps moving, we stop, but if you love the ones around you then the best way to heal is to keep going with the flow, without thinking whether it’s right or wrong, just embrace your children around you feel their love, live for them as they need you more than you know. Whenever you think of your son, think that he is working in another country and he is happy, coz he is seeing you in so much pain and believe me it will hurt him more to be the reason for this pain. So please change way you think and keep moving ahead slowly slowly everything will fall in place. It won’t be the same but it sure will be comforting to the other loved ones around you.

    • Find a counselor to talk to. If you are single, then you need someone to share your feelings with. Your kids are going through their own grief and clearly don’t understand how you feel. It’s best to stop talking to them about your son and save it for a counselor.

  4. Grief fills the room up of my absent child,
    Lies in his bed, walks up and down with me,
    Puts on his pretty looks, repeats his words,
    Remembers me of all his gracious parts,
    Stuffs out his vacant garments with his form;


  5. Calories give rise to energy but excessive level of calories appears into fats.
    If sometimes back in good condition is essential for you then these foods won’t allow
    you to achieve that. The results were run out skin and
    mental fuzziness and lastly cravings for fatty foods.

  6. The best protine sames include the lean ones – egg whites, lean meat,
    turkey, chicken, and fish. Would it mean gaining or reducing your weight and after that being more active, physically or socially.
    The results were dried out skin and mental fuzziness as well as cravings for fatty

  7. I read so many comments here about difficulty moving on from a death and it pains my heart. We live life as if death will never come near us, the only sure thing to come in life. and so when it does, we suffer so much, for so long, forgetting that in next to no time we will be gone too.

    I wrote this family book in hopes to ease this painful fear. http://www.horatiointhewind.com

    We are all the wind, I hope this helps.


  8. I lost husband in July of 2017… we,were only married a year n was shot and killed because of mistaken identity… I haven’t been able to get myself back on track… no it hasn’t gotten better or made any sense I couldn’t go to the funeral I couldn’t even leave the house for almost 2 months… I regret not saying a final goodbye at gus funeral n I’m stuck our kids miss him too but they keep reminding me that I’m still here and they need me…. thank you I needed to vent… ppl r tired of my pain n think I should be OK by now… he was my best friend n the only man I ever fell n love with I still feel like it’s wrong to date wtf uugghhhhhh…. thank you

    • It’s okay to vent, I hope you continue and find & seek out avenues/people to vent and grow as long as you need to, as long as it takes.

  9. We all know that all life comes to an end. The difference is that between us & the animals, we have a soul that is capable of love. Losing a loved one should not be a devastating experience! The hardest part is that we will miss them, but in time. we WILL see them again for eternity! That fact alone , is enough to carry one through any grief that one could experience. The bond of love will bring us together again!

  10. My son died almost 4 years ago. I feel gutted and list inthe workd. I am on meds. I pray, walk, I have close friends and a living husband. Nothing touches the pain. I am lost in the world without my son. It seems so empty.
    He was my firstborn child. I felt him move inside me. I nursed him for a year. He is gone. I hate to have people ask me how I am. I will not be OK again. I will not kill myself, but each day I go through is a day without my son and it feels pointless.

    • Sarah, I am so sorry for your loss of your precious son. When my husband died 3 years ago I found a grief group that has helped me more than I could ever say. If you haven’t looked for one of those, please consider trying that. Some places even have specific groups for the loss of a child. I have found that no one can understand your grief like someone else who has been through it. Wishing you comfort and love.

    • I just saw this comment. I lost my best friend a few years ago and just lost my cousin this week to suicide. They were not my children. I can not even start to understand your pain. I am a mother and these things just touch me in a different way because of that. You are so strong and it may seem pointless but you are strength for someone…I know it.

  11. I lost my dad last year in May. It was such a shock! He was 78 and we didn’t expect that he would die. I realised now that I was so strongly connected to him and he was my source and center. I feel lost now and without energy. Before I was able to live and work and survive but now I feel alone without strength. I realise that I got so much from him even the will to live and a purpose. Never understood his value until he was gone. He was a great man. He was a preacher, writer, sportsman, finance advisor and so much more. He looked well after us 4 children. Now I have 4 children of my own. Now I must face life without his support and strength. It is difficult without him and I still grieve especially these days coming into the new year. At times I feel like joining him and find no reason to go on. But I am still here and holding on. Thanks for your words of comfort.

    • Sorry for your loss of your father. My Mother just past on Friday & I find myself not wanting to be here either!! Our Relationship was rocking the last year. But I am Thankful I got to talk to her one last time b4 she died!! I feel num & still in shock!!
      Praying I can find a Grieving Counselor soon, to tell with all these emotions!!! 2 Of My Sisters Now are fighting over Life Insurance Policy and her belonging!! Jesus Help Me!!!!!

  12. I think it’s a shame to leave a dying mother at 90 years old to a brother who has a knee that was just prepared 8 months ago or a injured back from lifing his mother up none of the other family members would not let her go into nursing home shame on them all may God have mercy on them for neglected there brother. He did a wonderful job taken care of his mother and mentally challenged sister . With all his injuries and knee not healed because of no family member cared to help.

    • Sounds familiar. Been there, done that with my grandfather. The stress was off the charts.

    • Those people will have to live w the fact that they stood aside or stood in the way… the injured and loving son gets to live knowing he gave his all. Knowing you gave your best is a blessing beyond comparison. The son is a blessing and blessed.

  13. i lost my mother 17 years and 11 months ago when i was about to turn 3 ….growing up without her has been the most hardest part of my life …it makes me sad because i cant even remember how she looked like and also the fact that she never got the chance to teach me about teenage life and i also never got to know how her teenage life was like .Now as im growing up to become a woman it hurts more than what i felt when i was growing up because she will never get the chance to see her grandchildren . The pain is just too much to handle to the extent that i wish i could have been the one in her place .She might have passed away along time ago but my heart will never heal from that because everyday feels like her death happened a few hours ago.I will always love my mother .

  14. Thank you so much for this page its makes our burdens lighter. I lost my mum last month and i’m thankful I was by her side until the end. But it’s the memories that we will cherish.

  15. These are fucking terrible. Be aware of the highly sensitive people grieving. Assholes.

    • No need to show your stupidity…. there is nothing wrong with people who empathize. My Dad died at 69…and no one had any more grief than I did. I am still here & he is still with me. Just let people express their empathy….soon enough, even they, will be gone!

  16. Thanks so much for the time spent putting these messages together. God Bless

  17. Thank you for these quotes and the comments from others who are going through grief. I lost my Husband on Feb. 14 suddenly to a heart attack, he was 64. We were in an airport in Mexico ready to board our plane home when he said he felt dizzy and was going to faint. Those are the last words he spoke to me …he passed away in the emergency room . So unexpected, so devastating, so far from family. It has been almost 9 months and now I can finally say his name without crying, but there is a part of me that is gone and will never be the same. I am moving through what is left of my life trying to find purpose and hoping to once again feel joy. I am lonely , I miss having him by my side, enjoying our life together. We had so many plans, places we were going to see, looking forward to having time together just the 2 of us…but now I must move forward alone.

    • PJ,
      I lost my husband 6 and half years ago on July 16, 2012 in the same manner. Fortunately, I was not out of the country but in ND, I am originally from Florida, we were moving to his home state. I still cry and grieve for him. He was everything to me, my life, my dreams…life is definitely not the same. But hold on love, there are good times to be had, I have my children and grandchildren and they help so much. I think it is amazing that the baby, now 7 remembers his papaw and often tells me that he misses him. He was only two at the time his papaw passed away. Sometimes we just sit for a moment in the rocking chair and hug and remember a man that meant so much to so many. I will not tell you that the grief ever completely goes away, but I will tell you that after awhile you begin to see the good in things again and life goes on, and eventually you find happiness and special moments again. I keep my husband near me, in my heart at all times and I know that as long as I remember him, he is with me. One day we will be together again and I know that he is waiting for me, his last words to me were I love you see you tonight, tonight never came he died while at work from a heart attack, but I know that he loved me and he knew that I loved him, take comfort in knowing that your hopes and dreams are still with him and that he will forever be in your heart. Best to you, I pray for peace and blessings for you. May God comfort you.

  18. i love the messages…i have never felt anything more painful than grief. It breaks your heart and soul. Leaving you questioning everything that is on earth. Questioning even the life you have. It is really painful cause it breaks you from within.

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  20. Dunno what hit me or “triggered” my subconscious to actually type in this lo-o-ng search words/line on google: “quotes of feelings on losing someone special”…blah!!..then comes up a search list of related sites & what have yous..etc etc. I clicked on the 1st link & i’m here on wyg…such inspiring, sad, sharing-all, sharing-something stories…comforting reflections. Humanity & how we bond in such compelling overtures in our live’s passing phases (joy, laughter, tears, pain, anger, love, Life & death) – it’s such an underrated, unexplained testimony to how Truly majestic Our Heavenly Father, God Almighty the Creator has masterfully interlaced us all thru such Soulful reflections. Yes, they are all passing phases ~ losing Loved ones & dear ones, yet as hard it may dawn upon me on some dismal days, I take comfort in knowing that the feelings, & moments I go thru in seeing the joy of brothers & sisters in loving embraces, fun-spirited outings, family gatherings, I shall never have with my kid-sister who moved on 3yrs back. She was battling a silent fight (cervical cancer) but never once showed her torn spirit nor sought help (by way of open discussion, admission & seeking refuge, cultural, respect..) either thru me, or the other siblings. I silently & regretfully know now, that they (sisters & mum) must have kept it amongst themselves…leaving us boys out of the picture. And being the eldest & big brother in a broken & torn family of 7 raised by different uncles & aunts (as mum was a widow), it pains me to know that the Truth will never really ever set me free. So i guess, I’ll be writing just this once on this beautiful commentary site of wyg, but for what ever relief I find, I Hope & Pray that all you hurting, grieving, beautiful Souls out there, embrace grief. Hold it close, Hold it Dear. Smile at a newly budding rose..its a spiritual thing ~ for there is bound to be something they touched, a silly remark/expression they say about your nose, ear, smile, eyes..something unusually unique & theirs alone, that they left behind that makes you put on a silent smile, every once in a awhile. I write just this once, in letting my dear beloved small sister’s spirit know that, I still miss you very much Mummy Pao’..My Princess..My Queen, Paula Gene Arina’so. She always called me “Prince”…”My King”…”Daddy”…never my name, never.

  21. My mom died May 6th of this year. We never had a good relationship, but we had so many problems. My mom never hugged me, never said hello, never liked me as her own. I was never a bad girl, just longed for the love from her. I didn’t like her as a person, she was angry, mean, and at times abusing. But I still longed for a hug. I never got it. Not even at Thanksgiving or Christmas. I never got a Happy Birthday from her The past 5 years. She never wanted us 3 girls, never wanted a relationship with us. Her death has left such a big hole in my heart. I’m angry that she’s gone, . I hate waking up to a new day, when I haven’t been able to get thru the others. All of us siblings are fighting, not speaking, it’s such a mess. It’s so Hard getting thru without being able to Make amends! We never did. Her last phone message to me was horrible, and unbelievable. 1 week before she passed.

    • I just read your comment about your mother. I swear to God I thought you were talking about me and my two sisters. We lived the life you are speaking of and sadly we do not speak to each other at all. I think that’s what my mom wanted. It is so sad to think a life passed and so much hurt and regret and endless questions still exist. My sisters name is Jodi. I really think this is about us. God bless you

  22. I lost my husband on 6/9/18 to prostate cancer. He was only 56. He fought so hard for 2 years, he loved his life, our cats and he loved me. I’ve lost both my parents and most of my family but this is the absolute worst. The grief is unbearable, our house doesn’t feel like a home anymore. and my life will never be the same. I would give anything to see him walk through that door again. I miss him terribly.

    • My husband was 54. Survived 22 months, it was ahead will and lots of work but he lost his life July 17, 2018.

      I feel the same. It’s not a home it’s an empty house and my life is forever changed.

    • I lost my husband on February 12, 2019 to pancreatic and liver cancer. He was 58. He was diagnosed and died 35 days later. I didn’t even get a chance to process it becuase he died very fast. I’m still going through denial and my life will never be the same with out him. We were married for 10 years and I miss him more and more everyday. Our home is not the same without him. I sit in the livingroom and expect him to just walk and say ” honey I’m home” and my heart hurts when I realize that he will not be walking through the door. I will always love him and will keep the memories close to my heart.

      • I to lost my husband Feb 17,2019 to the same thing also he had bone and spine cancer,he went into the hospital not being able to breath come to find out he had a staff infection that eat thru the lung was poised and eat holes that led to phenomena, so that is what made me lose him,thankfully he lived a year an 4 month,after his first ripple surgery,I to miss him so bad these wall fill like they gave him ,he was with me a year from work couldn’t work so took care of him,night and day till the 17 of Feb 2019 it fell like my soul being ripped out today we was married be 22 yrs in June but been together for 26 years .I hope this pain get easier but right now I feel if I lost a part of my heart,I love you randy.

  23. One of my best friends died Monday night (July 31, 2018). We had been in a relationship for 15 years, but had not seen or talked to each other for almost a year, because of a falling out. I have to tell you that I have never experienced the type of absolute overwhelming grief like I did yesterday when I found out that he had died. He was not only my best friend for the last decade & a half, but the ONLY friend I had, pretty much, in the town I live in. When we would have a disagreement….even the last one, I at least knew that he was still here & still in this world. Now he isn’t here, anymore & he isn’t in this world. This is going to be one of the hardest things in my life to come to terms with.

  24. I am 42 lost my husband in a tragic accidentwhen I was 29…my daughter was 9months.I look and her and I crack all over again.I feel she was robbed of a loving father, of growing up in a nirmal happy family. I had to be brave and find a job so that we cld survive .this meant her going to boarding schools.some days are hard , like now .it sll comes back the hopelessness lonelyness and emptiness but one has to survive physically .my soul is no longer here.some days I ask who chose this path for me..
    Nothing makes me happyanymore.

  25. My son was murdered one month ago today. He was an attorney and was murdered by the ex-husband of a client that he represented in a divorce. It was senseless, almost random. The killer then committed suicide and left his own two small children without a father. My son was married but did not have children. He was a good man, a good husband to his wife, a good son to his mother and a good brother to his younger brother. I am proud of the man he had become. At his funeral, all the other attorneys and judges said what a kind, gentle man he was. So why was he killed? I just can’t reconcile this in my mind. I keep thinking that it was all a mistake or a nightmare and that he is alive and well. Then I realize that I am just thinking crazy and I fall apart all over again. I am so sad that I don’t know how I will ever be happy again…..

  26. Oh my dear Jillian, I’m so very very sorry for your family’s loss, its the absolute worst and I know, coz I lost the man I’ve called Dad since I was 8 years old, on the 29th of January this year(some 40years ago!). Like you, it was sudden and unexpected, however our family will never receive any closure because it wasn’t illness or accident, it was a determined and personal decision which has thrown our lives into chaos and disarray. I’m reaching out because we have something in common, which is wanting a better future for ourselves. A long and horrible story cut very short, I had to come back home to my Mum & Dad with my 3 beautiful children and they helped me get through the second worst event of my life. Now I’m mourning the loss of my Dad whilst trying to study fulltime and raise my 3 kids on my own. Should you study? Will it make you happy? Take 10 mins, quiet your mind and listen to your own body answer these questions. If it’s yes, then just go for it. Yep, its tough, but I’ve found it makes me more determined to succeed and the bonus is the distraction which gives me a little bit of relief from the absolute grief in my heart every day. One day the sun will shine again, but i’ll be busy until then…. I wish you all the best.

  27. Reading the quotes passes a little time that I find myself just trying to “get thru”. I’m married and have 2 kids. My mother-in-law died tragically 4 months ago and everyday seems to get worse. She had been going to the hospital to see and take care of her mom so much – who had just had a heart attack and then a blockage. She went home to shower . I will always remember her last text to me that day while I was in class. I said I was leaving school soon and we would see her at the hospital. I called and texted as I was leaving…nothing…. nothing. A fire started in her home while she was in the shower and had no idea. I have nightmares of her trying to make it out like she did. The firefighters found her right inside the front door when they broke in the door. How scared she must have been. Why would this happen to her? She deserved the world. She was revived 5 times from her home and to the time she died in the hospital 5 hours later. Her mother (grandma) must have known something was wrong when my M-I-L didn’t come back to the hospital… She died 12 hours after my M-I-L.
    My M-I-L and I were very close. So close. She was the person who could say the littlest thing to make me feel better about whatever redic thing it could have been. I’ve known my husband since I was just 11 years old and I am 34 now. She has been in my life- was in my life – my whole life, basically. My husband isn’t dealing with it well at all – he’s not one for “talking” about it – it just makes him upset. I feel so lost as she was who I could talk to about my husband . We have been thru a lot. He was injured while in the military and she really helped us deal and get thru the days. He’s NOT close with his father – doesn’t speak to- nada. His mom was who he felt he had left. It’s very hard to try and grieve in front of him. I go and hide to cry. My poor kids are “bored” because their momma doesn’t feel like doing anything and that kills me. The first couple months- I did anything to keep busy and I handled all of her final arrangements. I wanted to do it. I was the “strong” one. Now, I’m just lost. When my husbands injury/disability started- I put nursing school on hold to have children because I wanted to have that experience with him. Now that they are in school all day- I started from scratch and went back to school to get my pre-reqs. My mother-in-law was my biggest fan, biggest supporter of this. She knew what it felt like to want that and not be able to. I’m one class away from applying and I’m just stuck. How can I do all of that and try to get thru each day without her. I just want to see her walk in the front door and hear her call my name – or leave messages saying ” well hello my dear”. I literally don’t think this intense pain will ever subside – even just a little bit….. I’m terrified of what this will end up doing to my husband. to me- to our kids. ……

  28. Lost my soul mate to a sudden death age 35 – miss him beyond words I wouldn’t wish this type of pain on anyone I feel broken in two. I’m functioning but feel that life will only ever be about that, the light truly went out the day he died. We have no cause of death as yet likely sudden cardiac but the knowledge of being with him that whole day & then him dying when I went to work on his own haunts me. HIs death was also likely preventable and that hurts, I haven’t reached acceptance yet I’m still stuck holding on to what was and can’t ever be again.

  29. I miss my mom so much I’m talking to strangers on the internet about it. I can’t believe she’s gone. I don’t know how to keep going. Thank you for sharing.

  30. I lost my husband November 2017 we were together 52 years it’s good to know the sorrow I feel is normal like everybody I just wish I’d told him how much l loved him more times than I did ,now it’s to later but l have the memories and nothing can take them away .love you loads until we are
    together again.

  31. Missing my husband. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer on 3/1/18 and passed away 6/7/18. It happened so fast, that I couldn’t prepare for it. Now I am lost and lonely. It feels like I will never know happiness again.

  32. Lost my husband a month ago…can’t sleep at night …the grief is consuming me ..My son (7)Just keep asking questions and sometimes feeling down ..I don’t even know how to begin and start all over again …the pain is consuming.

  33. I have a hole in my soul over the loss of my mom, but I want her memory to be actively moving me toward filling holes that I can fill.

  34. Five years back my best friend (my soulmate for 25 years) her thirty two year old son was killed crossing a road. My children and her children were always together. My children will never fully recover from this loss.

    He was my friend’s son, but I had been a big part of his life from such a young age. I had never known sadness like this.

    What really has helped my friend and me to cope with his tragic death is that she has reached out to so many other children in need.
    “THERE IS SO MUCH TO DO IN THIS WORLD AND SO MUCH TO LOOSE IF IT IS NOT DONE”. By helping children of fathers who have committed suicide, we have found a purpose to lift them up by sponsoring for their education. It is as if saying “SO WHAT IF MY SON IS GONE, FOR IN HIS MEMORY HUNDREDS WILL LIVE ON”.

    When she and I receive pictures of these children, we see Paul (son who died) looking back at us and saying “Thank You Moms”.

    Will be glad to share more info.

  35. Tears are falling from reading everyone’s quote, I lost my son in law 4 years ago to suicide, stabbing himself over 100 times, he left behind my 2 granddaughters age 5 and 9.. they still mourn , the youngest granddaughter apologizes to her mom over and over again.. and as for my daughter she lost her first boyfriend to a homicide and then her husband to suicide.. the pain I feel with standing behind my daughter and granddaughters, I still cry, it seems as if it will never ever get easier..

  36. I am a hospice nurse caring for people at the end of their life cycle giving support , caring. You would think I would be better equipped with coping, but not so. When I l unexpectedly ost my twin brother 2/19/2017 my world has fallen gravity has multiplied .

  37. I lost my Husband two days before my birthday on the 08/06/2017, it happened so suddenly I miss Him like grazy and know will ever replace Him. the good memories are keeping me alive and strong. I am living for Him and my God. God will never leave me nor forsake me. It is well with my soul.

  38. Whenever your dear is in the serious level of cancer or hearth attack and doctors has dishoped her this maybe ignite a little hop in you search and read about cryonics plz for your dear put this massage in anywhere helpful or if you wanna comprise with die watch the wonder of the universe documentary serials

  39. I nursed my husband for ten years with vascular dementia .we don’t the journey together .he was wheelchair bound after a stroke 18 months ago he went to day centre where he was interacting ,he allways had a smile .i used to have rest bite and the nursing home took great care of him family went to see him .but in September we had to put him in a new nursig home because they other one had no beds .they did not look after him when I went to see him he was I’ll told them to get dr .he was given eight to ten hours he was crittacly ill he had a fall which they denied he was so dehydrated his kidney damage was I reversable .social service safe guarding team are investegating accute negligence .my husband lasted a week I was with him all day and night he knew I was there but anger is turning me up al the time we have a soloist or but it will not give him back to me how can I get over this heartbroken wife Mary

    • Mary, I can’t begin to understand what you are going through. I am so sorry. I don’t know you but my thoughts are with you, and I wish for you that you can hold on to some sense of hope. Sending love

  40. Bless all our lost loves and us-I try to remember they don’t miss us-they don’t know why we are sad, all they know now is happiness and peace-they are with all our others we lost. I know I will be with my lost loves one day and if they actually do see me grieving why can’t I feel them? I have PTSD from the loss of the love of my life 20 years ago- we were so young-I blame myself for not going with him that day. He was a great fisherman, he was very well known in Pinellas County Fl, Bahamas, Dry Tortugus and private islands owned by the rich and famous. I was by his side as much as I could handle it but it was a Sunday (we had been in car n boat accidents and was always blessed) he was going with the owner and an eye doctor plus they had nitrox. I loved the family he worked for , they treated me like family. If I wasn’t on the boat I was with the owners wife. That is where I was waiting for them to come back from a dive trip. Bad feelings started coming (which happened to be the approx time my husband was left down on the 3rd dive in the middle grounds-just cuz they wanted him to get a large hogfin – duh the owner of the boat and the doc did the 3rd deep dive with nitrox- needless to say my husband blew a cerebral and pulmonary embolism. He beat them to the top.)
    So many holes in the story-it wouldn’t have happened had I been there. I was told I was still part of the family. I really needed them for closure. Instead they spent 3 mill on a guest house and begged me to take a couple hundred thousand for his life. I donated most of it to two HIV friends as I didn’t know I would be on disability not long after his death. I was a kid-stuck in a private room alone with the owner crying his eyes out being told I would still be part of the family and they would help me when I needed.
    Then I made it a year and met someone that reminded me of my love-I met him at a psychiatrists office. We both thought we were not patients. I got married (lost what widows benefits I had-and now have a permanent injunction that he is not allowed near me, obviously still not in my right mind)
    I was diagnosed with a muscle disease and was told I would be lucky to make it to 40. Next the temporary marriage created a wonderful sis in law of 12 years and she helped me so much mentally. I will always love her and never thought I would lose her too. We were both experiencing the same medical problems and both diagnosed with cancer within 2 days of each other. I begged her not to get treatment (13 years of nurse-I see strong positive minds make it longer and more comfortable) Being very religious and having a spouse and 3 children- they scared her they told her she would only make it 3 months without 5 with. Lots of prayers-she made it one year and the worst year I have ever seen anyone go through chemo. At one point they said things had stopped growing so instead of waiting- they tell her its best to go on very strong caustic chemo to make sure it stays gone.
    I felt her pain one day in April-she didn’t want visitors anymore -2 hours away nobody is stopping me. I did get to see her one last time, unlike my husband. She looked so peaceful as she must have known it was finally going to be done. I touched her beautiful face-to my surprise-she opened her eyes and smiled like I remember seeing her. It was almost like she was waiting to see her bro and I-shortly after we left-she refused meds-food and hospice came and took her where it isn’t so traumatic with the whole family looking and crying. She was taken to a better place at 10 pm that night.
    I do think that happening and my illness (making me a hermit_in extreme pain-due to drug addicts causing my once amount of med\now cut in half which equals poor quality of life. I was on high dose over 7 years-I could function and put things out of my mind)
    Hoping I don’t suffer too much but truly looking forward to not missing anyone or having any pain-mental or physical. God bless u all. Time doesn’t heal only the end heals.

    • O Jody I read your life story and it absolutely broke my heart. My prayers are with you. May the Lord fill u with his peace and may u find comfort in his rest

  41. I lost my big brother 5 Oct 2017. I am forever changed. Each day I live is one day closer to him. I haven’t been happy sense. The worst are the dreams that his alive. They’re so painful.

  42. My favorite “Where there is love there is life”. Ghandi

  43. Craig Stephen Gilders The Love Of My Life One Day We Will Be Together Again

  44. I have just lost the love of my life five days ago… He was on his way home from work when a drunk driver hit him head on causing the airbag to deploy and than setting the car on fire. He was only 38. He was burned over97% of his body. I am so lost and want to be where he is. I cry all day and the quietness of the house is unbearable. I miss everything about him. His smell, his smile, his voice,his touch….I feel sick to my stomach and sometimes I just don’t want to be here. I miss him holding me tight which always led to our love making more memories. The day he died is the day my heart was ripped out of my chest. RIP STEVEN EDWARD SHIELDS JR.
    04/12/79 – 07/21/2017

    • Lisa, you are not alone. I lost my husband in a mountain accident 3 years ago. It’s been horrible and I still miss him every day. The best piece of advice I got was to catch any tiny ray of light but probably for you it’s too early to see them. They will come back. Second piece of advice is to take great care of you, get counseling, whatever it helps for you to cry and let the pain and feelings out. I’m deeply sorry for you, can only relate and let you know you are not alone and life goes on but this is too early for you. The WYG website and resources helped me a lot, especially the podcasts. I’m sending you a lot of love and courage all the way from Switzerland.

    • Hello Lisa,
      I am so sorry for your loss and my heart truly breaks for you. I lost my husband if 36 years on 7/22/17. He was sick for a 6 years with horrid multiple myeloma but had been ok until just recently. I had to take him to the ER with what I thought was pneumonia and he never left. I am so alone in my house that is no longer a Home and I cry all day. I honestly don’t know how to function. I am sending you a hug and wish I could do more to take away the pain. Nights and mornings are unbearable. Right now I’m just passing the hours listening to the crickets outside my window and waiting to get so tired I just pass out. Take care of yourself ❤️

    • Lisa I know the feeling your going through
      I lost my fiancé Dec 21, 2016 and I still feel lost and heartbroken 😔 I miss him so much…. everyday I wake up and think of him 🙏🏽 Your definitely in my prayers

  45. My wonderful twin brother passed away 9 months ago having lost his life to alcoholism . The overwhelming sense of grief is surpassed by the intense sadness I feel about his unhappy life . I go through my day functioning and seemingly coping but it’s like I’m weeping inside all the time , I want to go back in time and help him towards happiness I know it’s impossible but it’s all I think about .

    • I’m so sorry for your loss Kay. I lost a good friend to alcoholism a year and a half ago, since that day I have seen his family come undone. This family use to be very close, but I am afraid they will never be the same. I am a volunteer at a bereavement center where I help facilitators with group therapy. I have sat with so many who were grieving over their loss, but I’ve also seen them learning how to cope by sharing with others who are going through the same type of grief. My friends family have refused to get any kind of therapy but I truly believe they would benefit from reaching out.
      If you have never tried group therapy I strongly suggest that you give it a try. The hardest part is walking through those doors and talk to strangers about the most devastating thing you have ever faced, but once you do and you find the right group the world won’t seem so heavy because the first thing you will learn is that you no longer have to go through this alone.
      You have a long road ahead of you but try to remember your not alone. Good luck on your journey Kay.

    • I feel your pain. I lost my brother to alcoholism a year ago. Its a hard one to cope with but things will ease, be gentle on yourself and realise that these things take time. I am sending you a big hug as I know what you are going through xx

    • I lost my husband just 2 weeks ago. He died suddenly.I found him at the bottom of the stairs. Sadly,he was an alcoholic.

  46. I have a book now in making which requires me to sample ideas of scholars like you. Please could you help me with practical life experience about the tragic errors which have made you to abandon your faith for a while and their possible solutions. Every idea made will be documented for rebuilding our spiritual lives

    Thank you for your efforts in anticipation.

  47. Your absence is painted on my daily landscapes

  48. I lost my mum ,Nov 2016, then I lost my husband, April 2017, I still hadn’t dealt with losing mum when my husband died, it was only a couple of months short of our 20th wedding anniversary, my mum was 62, and my husband was only 46. they both died from cancer and they both had a short, harsh fight. I could get thru one of the other was here to support me, but losing both has ripped my heart out. The quotes on here have helped me many times. I would have done anything to keep either of them for just one more day, but that would have been so selfish because they needed to go and not be in pain, they’d suffered enough and I accept that now. I need to go on for my children, although it’s hard, that’s an understatement, I will go on for them. I will never, ever get over this hurt and feeling of loss, but in time I will learn to live with it, and maybe even smile again.xxx

    • Oh Melissa, your story resonates so with me, but the other way around. I lost my beautiful husband of 21 years at 48 in Feb 2016 (suddenly and unexpectedly) and then my Dad 10 weeks later. I was reeling from one, and then the other and there have been so many times when I have wished for just one more day. 19 months later, it is different and you do become more functional, but it is still so very very difficult. I too have teenagers to take care of and they help you cope – more’s to the point – get through each day because you just have to for them. I am having a cryey day today and its days like this that I find this website so good in helping me to sort out and articulate the mess of my internal emotions and irrational thoughts. I am so lost and facing a future stolen without my husband, but there are good days – the kids and my dogs provide most of these – they make me smile. So I stick with them. Someone said to me in the early days to find something that makes you smile and stick with that until you are ready for the next thing. Its ok for the steps to be small. At the time I thought it was complete bollocks, but as the months have gone by it has turned out to be true. Take care.

  49. My husband passed away on January 18, 2016 and then my Mom passed away on January 23, 2016. It has been a difficult journey. I was married for almost 39 years. It is rough when you need and want your Mom and she is not there. I’ve read several books on how to make sense of your grief but at times it just seems so unbearable because I fall backwards. It seems that you take a step forward but then two steps backwards. Want so much to dream with them but can’t seem to or don’t remember if I did. The loneliness at times is unbearable. I know I have to push forward but it is hard. My memories are what keeps me going.

    • I’m sorry for your loss.. My condolence would never fill the gap occurred in your life. However, those whom we love and want so much to live by my side always can never be lost because they use to live in our hearts and they can never be separated from us until we loss ourself!

  50. I happened upon this site while looking for some kind of inspiration to keep going on. I lost my wife of 12 years 6 years and 5 months ago. I go about my days and try to do the things she would have wanted me to do, but I feel like it’s pretty pointless and feel hollow inside. This grief bit isn’t for the weak at heart. The words of Keanu Reeves have helped me many times when I feel overwhelmed:
    “Grief changes shape, but it never ends.
    People have a misconception that you can deal with it and say, ‘It’s gone, and I’m better’.
    They’re wrong. When the people you love are gone, you’re alone.
    I miss being a part of their lives and them being part of mine.
    I wonder what the present would be like if they were here – what we might have done together.
    I miss all the great things that will never be,”

    I miss you D.

    • You are right, Bill. I lost my husband last August. His absence from this world is almost incomprehensible. When someone so kind, so funny and so intelligent and loving is gone, there is no replacing them. I know that none of us are getting out alive, and this is the way of the world, but I feel so cheated, so bereft. I miss his presence enormously.

  51. My darling mom passed away 9 days ago and wondering how i can ever smile again. It is so hard to try and get on with your life.I am an adult have grown daughters of my own and trying to strong is so difficult. Mom is the first person to kiss you. I just miss her terribly.

  52. I am just a mom, just a mom who lost her son almost two years ago. He was only 30 when he passed over. My heart broke that day. I have never recovered. Oh, I get up every day. I go to work. I put on my make up. I talk to people. I smile. I tell everyone I am ok. I lie. I still cry everyday. I imagine I always will. I grieve deeply, because I loved him deeply. I just plain miss my boy. I look at the front door and just can not conceive of the fact that he won’t come bouncing through, “hey, mom!”….Never again? Really?
    So, I go about my day….I have good memories. I have my other son, Joe and my grand daughter and love them both of course. But one does not replace another. There is a hole in my heart. My son Ryan died of an overdose which makes it even harder to deal with, there is guilt, did I do enough, did I intervene quick enough……Our last time together he was best man at his brothers wedding. We had a great time! Exactly one month later he was gone. He had been clean and relapsed. I have learned a lot bout the disease of addiction since then. I wish I had done more, I know Ryan forgives, I know God forgives me. Not sure I will ever forgive myself. After all, I am just a mom….Take care all….Always and forever Ryan P Frye’s Mom! visit him at Ryan P Frye Virtual Memorial

    • Hi Jeanne
      I know your pain; I lost my son almost two years ago, also. Unexpected; he was killed; we had to say a post-goodbye at a funeral home on Christmas Eve because the DIL……it – the loss of an adult child is so horrific; not only did we lose our son but we lost our friend, who had become our peer. I know your feelings of guilt; I have so many “if only, then maybe…” – and that’s hell. With the loss of my son went also a total loss of my belief system. But I guess there is some comfort, because I am no longer afraid of dying myself, just in case there is an After. I’ve lost friends because I don’t always handle my grief well; can’t always anticipate when its going to punch me between the eyes again. But your post has given me a comfort, knowing that another knows. Is that wierd? Its not meant mean. Anyway, thanks for your post; I get you.

      • I lost my adult son 3 months ago. I don’t know if I will ever recover. It was tragic, unexpected, violent. I hate waking up to face another painfilled day. I’m tired of crying. I’m exhausted from hurting. I understand how you feel. The loss of a child is so unnatural, it goes against the way things are supposed to play out. It’s an unbearable pain. I go through the whole range of emotions everyday. Anger, hopelessness, numbness and always the pain…the pain. I feel for anyone who’s in this along with me, even though I don’t know you.

    • My son was killed in a car accident on a country road, not striped, intense fog driving his 7 yr old to school. It took them 25 minutes to cut him out of the car. Miraculously our7 yr old grandson was very sore, had seat belt abrasions, and pain but after almost two days of tests and observations was sent home. My son died in the ambulance. I didn’t even get to tell him i love him. My grandson was brave but scared when Grandpa had to tell him his father was not able to survive the accident. He had just told me while I was rubbing his little hand that he was worried about his dad, and did I know where he was? It was arranged that my husband tell him with a child grief advocate there to help. It was so hard and heartbreaking. I also can’t remember ever lying to him before. The way his eyes looked into mine I feel like such a letdown to him because he had always been able to count on me before. He lived with daddy and visited mommy 1,000 miles away. His mom got there the same day and I knew although my son had just received papers she wa willing to let him have physical residence, after around 4 years beinh grandma/mom I not only lodt my son that day but our grandson would be miles away and our family would be limited on securing his welfare. But I know what you mean, I feel like I’m losing my mind knowing I’ll never see my son come through our door and head straight to the fridge, open and then close it almost immediately. Three or four times before he found what he wanted. It’s so unbelievable. I’m so grateful my grandson is OK and the 17 year old in the other car walked away. But I don’t know how I’m going to get through this. Nineteen years ago we lost another son in a horrific accident. He was my stepson, but I’d raised him since 18 months old. My sons already suffered that. Jason named his son after his brother Freddy. There were no steps in our family. They were brothers. Today is Jason’s birthday. My grandson’s was two days ago. I can’t accomplish anything it seems. I know I’m doing what has to be done, but I’ve got to take a day soon to just cry, and not stop until I’m out of breath.. I want him, I need him. He was d wonderful, he was a handful. He’s driven me crazy and filled me with pride and joy. My greatest regret is not praising him enough for being such a great single father. I’m not new to this. Nineteen years we buried Freddy and we have never really recovered. If I’m speaking to anyone who has lost a child no matter what age you know what I mean. I just don’t know if I can do it again. I’m almost 20 years older, already broken. But I will, I have no choice. His grown daughters do need me when they hurt. And I pray we will be allowed to have Freddy visit all of us here. It was his father’s mission in life he grow up here. He’s missed by everyone. He’s got to be cared for, be will know about his father. They lived together like two tight partners. I’ll have to be strong for my husband too. I just need to get month old thank you cards finished to our overwhelmingly loving community. Everyone loves Jason and Freddy. I’ll make it, I won’t let Jason down. I just need more than tears and breakdowns. I need to cry and son scream and pray. Thanks for listening.

      • My grown son died 3 months ago, he would be 43 today. ‘They’ say the loss of a child is the greatest grief of all. ‘They’ are absolutely correct. I honestly don’t see how it’s possible to get over this level of pain. I’m just telling the truth as I see/feel it. It’s real, unfathomable, exhausting.

  53. I lost my cherished husband May 30, 2016 after knowing each other for almost 60 years. That was still not enough time. He took a part of my heart with him and I hope it keeps him at peace finally. Cancer took him away…

  54. Thanks for these quotes. I lost my father 3 weeks ago and I’m just starting to understand my grief and where it will take me…

  55. Dear bkb,
    I’m so saddened to hear of your husband cancer. I’m sure you’re daughter well always remember how much her daddy fought to stay with you both. Sorry on the loss of your dad and all the ways you wish it was different,

  56. Thank you for the quotes — My father died this morning and we were estranged on and off for years. He was not a nice person – to anyone and , as I explained to my 7 year old – he did not want to be a daddy. Which makes it harder since my husband has terminal cancer. Still grieving what I wished my father could have been and grieving in advance for my daughter who will lose her daddy in the near future. My father drank himself to death – and my husband is fighting every day to stay here…

  57. Thank you for the quotes. My husband died on May 27, 2016. I miss him so. We still made each other laugh after 16 plus years of marriage. We were often thinking about the same things. Even though he had ALS and we knew he did not have much time. His death was sudden. I felt like I was awake and in a nightmare. I was totally unprepared for his death. What brings me comfort is knowing I was able to care for him at home. He wanted to stay home. Knowing he is not suffering helps me get through the day. Knowing my husband would not want me to let my grief consume me helps and prayer throughout the day.

  58. Cassie, I always thought we would get a few more vacations in before one of us had to go first. . I miss you every day, almost every minute. I had forgotten how much a person can cry. You were and always will be my most loved sister. I do know I’ll see you again, but how do I make it until then.? You are gone for now but not forever. I’ll see you again. Enjoy your blessed life living with our Jesus. Until then, I’ll do my best to enjoy the life I have here. We’ll have so much to talk about In Heaven. Can’t say anymore now because I can’t see the keyboard from crying
    .I love,love love you. “Iodine”

  59. RIP Suraj. luv u. ? live forever in my heart my friend.

  60. Have lost a great Friend who is so dear to my heart,Henrietta Tetteh, I love you though we were not Kent to be together,but I know you are resting in the blossom of the Almighty God

  61. This is from MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING, by William Shakespeare …

    But there is no such man; for, brother, men
    Can counsel and speak comfort to that grief
    Which they themselves not feel; but, tasting it, 25
    Their counsel turns to passion, which before
    Would give preceptial medicine to rage,
    Fetter strong madness in a silken thread,
    Charm ache with air and agony with words.
    No, no; ’tis all men’s office to speak patience 30
    To those that wring under the load of sorrow,
    But no man’s virtue nor sufficiency
    To be so moral when he shall endure
    The like himself. Therefore give me no counsel:
    My griefs cry louder than advertisement. 35
    Ant. Therein do men from children nothing differ.
    Leon. I pray thee, peace! I will be flesh and blood;
    For there was never yet philosopher
    That could endure the toothache patiently,

  62. My husband died very suddenly on our honeymoon 11 months ago We had both been married before but had been together for 19 years and our wedding was the happiest day of my life! He died 3 weeks and 1 day after our wedding and I miss him so much . It would have been our 1st anniversay in 2 weeks ! He was my rock and the love of my life and I so need him to help me deal with the pain. He always sorted everything !! I so believe that it is only people who have experienced this pain who can truly understand about the journey on the road we don’t want to be on to a place we don’t want to go ! I do get comfort from reading of others in the same position and I wish comfort and happiness eventually for the future to us all !

  63. I lost my mom 7 years ago.. guilt for everytime we argued and being selfish too.. guilt for not knowing how much she really loved me more than herself. Guilt for not doing anything when she was sad and lonely. Mom, I miss you so much and I’m sorry for not being a good girl for you..

  64. My grief is almost 4 months old and it still feels like yesterday. I have never known sadness like this. I lost the man I love. He came into my life 4 years after I separated from and divorced my husband of 32 years. He made me laugh! I couldn’t believe how good it felt to truly laugh with someone other than my friends, children and grandchildren. I miss him so much and I carry so much guilt. Guilt for not knowing he had heart problems, guilt for not being there when he died, guilt for every time we argued and I didn’t let it go. Guilt for not saying I love you the night before he died. I want that “one more day, one more conversation.” I begged for it and it didn’t happen. He didn’t come back. I love him and I miss him so much. The grief hurts so badly.

    • I can so relate to you, Katy. I lost my Ben 6 months ago. We were both widowed and our first marriages were not very happy ones. Ben and I were together seven years and married four of those years. We were define soul mates. Thanks for sharing.

    • I was married to my wonderful husband for 53 years, he was such a caring man. We had one son & it has been one year now & it is so hard. Mom is in skilled nursing & I help her so much but totally miss my husband so much, make it through the days but evenings hurt so bad, I feel I have a hole in my heart.

  65. I like what Stephen King said in his book ‘Revival.’ After the scene in which the reverend’s 6-y.o son gets hit by a car and dies. The reverend becomes livid with anger and delivers a sermon that offends people in the town.
    The main character’s father says to him “Reverend was right about one thing. People always want a reason for the bad things in life; sometimes there ain’t one.”
    My daughter’s dad was killed on September 11. I’ve wondered why it happened ever since it occurred. I’ve wondered everything imaginable and asked myself questions that would probably sound silly reproduced on paper or online. I just asked myself one today. People used to tell me it was “part of God’s Will” and other things. I won’t believe any of it since reading what Stephen King said: “People always want a reason for the bad things that happen; sometimes there ain’t one.”
    People may think that’s cold comfort but I find it more consoling to hear that than “it was God’s will.” That sounds and feels barbaric to me.

  66. I too am crying, because so many of these are how I feel. It’s “only” been 10 months since I lost my husband, but the pain and loneliness are growing exponentially with each passing moment. Losing the only person that truly loved me has been difficult beyond measure. What I wouldn’t give for one more smile, one more hug, one more ” I love you more”.

    • I can understand what you are saying as I too suddenly lost my husband September 4th 2015. My 4 children and I are going through hell. One of my 8 yr old sons found him. I find every single day like groundhog day. Gutted feeling all the time. We function but I am unable to enjoy anything.
      It certainly does matter what people say because some people think I am crying because I am a single parent now but that’s not it, it’s the fact that we loved each other and we didn’t choose to leave one another. Feel some people trivialise the children’s and my grief. Our hearts are broken…

  67. I always admired Thoreau’s comment,
    “On the death of a friend, we should consider that the fates through confidence have devolved on us the task of a double living, that we have henceforth to fulfill the promise of our friend’s life also, in our own, to the world.”

  68. Quotes are most helpful to the person responding to someone who is grieving (cards, remembrances), but as the person doing the greiving, they didn’t help me when I lost my child, parents, or spouse. The one person who could help me through grief was the one who was gone. How hard to loose one’s confidant.
    Grieving is such a personal space. What helps one may not help another. Sometimes silence and recogntion that grief is a very hard travail are better than any quote or words. Let the person who is grieving tell her story. The most comforting words anyone ever said to me were, “I know this is a hard time for you.”

    • Thank you Dee Randolph. My beloved nephew died this week and the pain is very fresh. I feel grief but his father and mother have oceans upon oceans of grief. Thank you for sharing your story. I will keep your words in mind as we gather to mourn my nephew and comfort my brother and his family.

    • 19 years after losing my 2 youngest children through a family murder/extended suicid, I am able to read through these quotes with ease and find the one that best describes my situation. Khalil Gibran kind of says it all for me. I am so very sorry for your loss. I do hope that one day you will find comfort and strength through other people who have been through a similar loss. Grief has no end …. It changes over time but does not end. It is very difficult to accept but that’s the bottom line.

  69. Thanks for these quotes – I’m crying now.
    I lost my husband from a mountain accident last May – he fell down a steep slope, in the snow. I met a nice man some time ago – he’s in love with me, I’m not sure if I’m ready yet. Last week he was holding me and I started crying. He told me “your tears are my tears”. I doubted he could understand me. Now reading the quote about “what separates us from the chaos is our ability to mourn people we’ve never met” I started crying again. I feel it’s spot-on, I feel I should start trusting him. My pain is so deep, can it be shared by somebody who never met my husband?
    Thanks so much for your posts.

    • Hello I read your post and it touched me. I volunteer at a bereavement center, and I have have worked with a widows group, the one thing they all had in common was they felt like they were cursed. What you are feeling is the grieving process and you should never deny yourself any part of the process. It sounds like you have found yourself a good man. Try not to look at it as replacing your husband but more like another chapter in your life. You have plenty of room in your heart to love the one you lost and the one you found. Try to find yourself a new normal, keep your husband in your heart and trust that he would want you to be happy, and don’t rush the grieving process. God bless…….

    • I am so sorry for your loss, your post actually made me cry more than these quotes did, I hope you could open your heart to the man you referred to in your post. I am starting to understand loss but only slowly, my father is dying, last he had heard his doctor said his kidneys were only at seven percent function, if I were older I could donate my kidney and help. I was writing my college essay about maturity and how loss contributes to it and looking up quotes for it, I probably won’t use any of these, but thank you for your post, it helped me see that grief may always be present in a persons heart but it doesn’t have to be the only feeling. I am so sorry for what happened to your husband, thank you for being brave enough to share your story.

      • Thank you for your post on my post… Two years after my husband’s accident I am still on my way, with ups and downs. The man I was referring to is still around and still in love with me but I am not fully ready yet, still need a lot of time on my own or with friends, trying to sort my internal mess out. Yes lots of feelings can co-exist, some time I even feel I am just free! Then the loneliness and sadness reappear. I learned a lot during this process, I learned we are all grievers and all coping. I learned to catch any ray of light.
        I wish Peace to you and your father.

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